Flu Shot Scandal of 2012

Things to know as background for this post (It's mostly background, sorry about that):

• My parents are leaving on Monday morning to go to the Virgin Islands. 
• They have both had their flu shots, forever ago.  They've definitely kicked in.
• My stepmother, who works for people who have little walk-in clinics in drugstores, decided to get Tamiflu for them in case they came down with the flu while on vacation.
• Apparently, because of some huge (and typical, as this seems to happen every year) mistaken understanding of the global need for flu shots (Hello, how many people are there in the world?  How many flu shots did you sell last year? Okay, plan for at least that many.  Oh, you didn't sell them in Europe last year?  Well what proportion of people in other countries get flu shots?  Okay, plan for at least that many.), the makers of Tamiflu (I'm looking at you, Genentech) have not prepared enough doses of Tamiflu to get us through the cold and flu season.
• If by "us" my stepmother means "the UK" because my brief investigation does not indicate fears of shortage in the United States.
• http://www.prweb.com/releases/2012/11/prweb10105617.htm
• Because of the "information" or "allegations" shown above, my stepmother came home with only one course of Tamiflu, rather than the two courses that would be needed if both of my parents simultaneously came down with the flu while in the Virgin Islands, despite the fact that they have both been vaccinated.
• My father's reaction to the fact that she only brought home one dose was as though she had injected him with live Influenza virus.  According to his whining, she must not love him and she has definitely forgotten that his physician brother (now retired) totally prescribed my stepmother with plenty of doses of Tamiflu in the past, how can she be so selfish, now they're going to encounter the flu and only SHE will get the medicine -
• (This was almost the exact same argument my exboyfriend and I had in 2001, living in Manhattan after the World Trade Center attacks, when his mother sent his brother and him each a gas mask and a course of Cipro in case of air or anthrax attacks.  We had been together like 1 month, but times were stressful and I accused him of deliberately trying to live when I, of course, was definitely going to catch anthrax and die.  At least we know where I get my deductive reasoning...)
• She pointed out that HE could actually be the one to take the course, but this was ignored -
• They're probably both going to die now
• And wait, wait, hold the phone - while they're fighting about the Tamiflu neither of them will need but one of them will certainly die without - has Maryellen had a flu shot?  
• They yell upstairs to me.  
• I am sitting on the floor of the bonus room, laughing at them and preparing to watch Real Housewives of Beverly Hills, in no way prepared to be targeted by their argument.
• "Have YOU gotten a flu shot?" my father demands.
• Now, the truth is, I had deliberately not gotten a flu shot this year, for weak reasons known heretofore only to me, but I'll tell you since I've gotten this far with the story.
• I don't want one.
• I'm lazy.
• I don't like the possible flu-like symptoms one can acquire by getting the vaccine.  If I'm getting flu-like symptoms, I might as well have the flu.
• (While the symptoms are annoying after the shot, this is an asinine argument, because the flu is horrible, horrible, horrible and the weak symptoms one may or may not get from the vaccine are nothing in comparison)
• (I know all this but still can't come up with a convenient time to get the shot; there's never a good time for flu-like symptoms)  
• I am hopefully going to nursing school next year, and will now have to get flu shots for the rest of my life, so I kind of wanted one last flu-shot-less year to myself to do my own devil-may-care flu thing.
• "No," I respond. 
• They both explode in shock and concern for their own lives - WHAT?  There's a person living in this house who has not had a flu shot?  What if this person brings the flu into the house?  All they have to protect themselves is the fact that they're both vaccinated and one dose of Tamiflu!  This can't be true, this can't be right - the vaccine doesn't even kick in for two weeks, good God, get the vaccine - you're in mortal danger and could kill us all - your studies could go completely down the drain - all that work, lost to the wind because you get the flu and miss school!  
• DO YOU HEAR US???  GET A SHOT! 
• I consider this.  I don't really want one.  But they seem to have me cornered.  I flip through my reasons for not getting one.  None seem to stand up to their hysteria.
• "Okay, I'll get one," I say.
• "You HAVE TO GET ONE, I can't BELIEVE you haven't gotten one, they don't even kick IN for two WEEKS -- "
• "I said I'd get one."
• "WHEN will you get one?  It has to be done immediately you don't understand your schoolwork could all go to hell --"
• "I'll do it this weekend."  I don't want to get one this weekend.  I have to work all day Saturday and really don't want to be inconvenienced by flu-like symptoms.
• "You'd better, you're really tempting fate, you have to get one, God forbid you get the flu and bring it into this house and we all get it --"
• "I'll get one THIS WEEKEND, I already said."
• I have no plans to get a flu shot and they will probably forget about it.
• Nope.  All week: "Did you get your flu shot yet?" ... "Is it this weekend?  Then no, I probably haven't gotten it yet."

Today, after class, against everything in me, I drove to Walgreens and waited for my flu shot.  I  read the pamphlet and saw that chances were slim that I would have any symptoms.  I also canvassed three or four people at school and asked if they had gotten their shots and if so, did they have symptoms?  And nobody had gotten symptoms.

After the shot, I asked the guy administering it, "Is it common to get flu-like symptoms after getting the shot?"

"Yes," he said.  "About 50% of people do get those symptoms."

So, obviously, now I can't lift my arm and have a million-degree fever and need to go straight to bed.  Those flu-shot bastards.  Actually, I feel fine, but am sure it will kick in when I least expect it.

The Bachelor Synopsis for Tonight

The show opened with the girls being given the news from Chris Harrison that a) this week there will be one one-on-one date, one group date, and one two-on-one date. Also, they are leaving the house in the hour forever! And their new home will be: two RVs, which are parked out front.

Ali, Tenley, and three others go in one, whereas Vienna, Gia, Cory and someone else go in the other.

The first stop is a winery, where they meet Jake. It didn't occur to any of the girls to get pretty or put on cute clothes while in the RVs, so they're kind of slovenly. Jake asks how they feel about camping, and points out that he has his own tent over there - and Vienna steps up and says she loves camping, "We talked about this," and hugs him, which pisses everyone off. Jake hands Gia a card, which turns out to be the one-on-one date card, for her.

Vienna in the confessional: Jake's a Southern boy, Gia's a New Yorker. I don't think this is going to work.

Jake shaves, Gia gets ready. He's not sure how he feels about her yet, or what to expect from a city girl in the middle of a vineyard. She's getting a bit fancy for such a country setting, but it's her first one-on-one with him, so she's psyched.

Vienna: she is totally wrong for him! It's not going to work. (Hey Vienna, this is the ONLY person in the house who's nice to you, so STFU.)

Jake and Gia play hide and seek among the grapes. "Feels like the beginning of a fairy tale" to Jake. They have a picnic on a blanket and she admits to being a nerd in school, and getting her bookbag stolen all the time. He admits he never had a date because he was too shy. She admits her first kiss was horrible and happened during a game of spin the bottle. They finish a bottle of wine and agree to play right then. Mwuablauhyuahbluah.

The other girls decide to act like coyotes and howl. ? Then they get the group date card. That includes everyone except Gia (obviously), Ella, and Kathryn (who will be the two-on-one date later, and now are very tense, because one of them is definitely going home).

Jake and Gia have a nice time at his tent. He asks what she imagines it would be like if she's the one he picks, and she says a long engagement, marriage for a few years before kids, two kids of their own and an adopted girl from China. She has smores in her hair.

He's impressed that the city girl was totally down with hot dogs and smores and not a diva about it, and all was sweet with them. In her confessional, she throws all her hair over one shoulder and says she hasn't felt like this in "a year and a half," which kind of took the wind out of it for me, I'll admit it.

Group date time - Vienna is glad to be on a date with him, but not a GROUP date, because "He's my boyfriend" so why are the others there? but whatever. They drive dune buggies. Ali calls shotgun with him. Vienna in the confessional: do what you like, because I'm the one that's going to marry him.

Jake ends up having a great time with...TENLEY while sandboarding (snowboarding on the sand).

Then he wants to roll down the hill, but the only one willing to do that is...CORY. She has decided it's time to piss or get off the pot, and he's glad she's opening up.

They get to this inn, and the girls clean up (one claims she's glad she's "finally" getting a real shower after the RV...um you've been in that RV for a DAY) and he starts the one-on-one process. It starts with Ashleigh. She's all up in his business, laying it on way thick. He notices how smoking she is, but in the confessional he says he has no chemistry with her. She tells him she should get the rose. He goes back out and tries to take Vienna next, but she wants to go LAST. Waah-waaaaaaaaaaaaah.

So he takes Ali, who again mentions how hard it is to show affection when there are so many others around. She asks what he's thinking about, going into the rose ceremony. He says he's not worried about it, he's counting the moment. I personally feel like she's starting to screw it up.

Back at the other RV, Chris has sent a card saying, two girls, one rose, one stays, one goes. Cold-blooded!

Ella starts boo-hooing.

Jake's one-on-one-ing with Tenley, wanting to make sure she's over her ex-husband. He was a policeman; another girl started working there, Tenley learned it through phone bills. She hasn't dated since then, but that doesn't make Jake nervous. He's lying in her lap. He smooches her. He sits up and smooches her.

Here comes VIENNA. Duh, duh, Dunhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh.

The girls muse about whether they think she'll go home...Vienna schemes about how being last could get her the rose. Jake tells her he thinks she brings on the ire of the other girls, and "sometimes it's better just to not say anything." Vienna wants to know if there's anything else they can talk about, what else he thinks about her. He tells her to wait and see, but tells the confessional he sees red flags.

Rose time: he wants to give it to someone he may have ignored in the beginning, and tonight he's giving it to Tenley, thanking her for being patient.

Cory is frustrated. Ashleigh is shocked, thinking that Tenley is too bubbly.

DRIVING UP THE COAST AGAIN

Ella is concerned about the two-on-one date, as Kathryn will be there and this will be kind of miserable. They get to Big Sur, and Jake welcomes everyone. Ella and Kathryn pack and prepare. Ella's really worried about the Kathryn factor, whereas Kathryn just mentions in her confessional that she thinks he could be her soul mate.

Jake wants to open his heart to them in an intimate dinner in his cabin; Ella starts the conversation asking him what he's looking for; he answers and asks what she wants. As she's speaking, Kathryn interrupts rudely but backs off and allows Ella to speak. Then he takes Ella outside for some private time. He says he loves Ethan (her son) but she tells him she is more than just a mom, and she's a whole package. And he tells her that the reason she's there tonight is that if he isn't sure about her, he doesn't want to keep her from Ethan.

Kathryn gets alone time now...he's been wanting to talk to her all night. (Mind you, she's pissed off, because she feels like he never pays any attention to her.) She spends her entire alone time bitching at him for holding back, and he says that she is so beautiful, he is being cautious. She claims that they have a great start together but it has progressed slowly in some ways and faster in others. I don't know what she's talking about, I've never seen them together, adn if I did, it's so forgettable, *poof*! Be gone.

He sends Ella home. Why did they even cast her? All they did was regurgitate last year's single mother episode - completely ridiculous. Bad bad bad. At least Jason and Stephanie had some chemistry last year. Or seemed to? Or something? This is a joke.

She tells him, "Be wise in who you choose," and gets into the waiting limo. He whispers, "Thank you, Ella," exhales, and goes back into the cabin. Tells Kathryn there were a lot of things she said, and that she is going to meet a guy that's going to sweep her off her feet, and he wants to be that guy, but his heart is telling him he's not that guy.

BOO-YAH, he sends her home too. "I thought I had a rose...I mean, did anyone see that coming at all? I don't get it."

The other girls see the luggage of both ladies disappearing, and start to cry.

Ella is "hoping Jake doesn't crash and burn, and makes the right decisions, because if he doesn't...God help him."

Very dramatic music. Cue Jake tossing the rose into the fire.

Now they're at a big white mansion. They prepare for the rose ceremony. Jake takes Corrie, which is the right way to spell her name, for some private time. She is jokey and fun. He makes her promise to keep opening up, she says it's a deal. He comes back and grabs Ali, and brings her outside, and she says she thinks he did the honorable thing by letting both Ella and Kathryn go last night and admits she's falling for him, and he's so happy and kisses her and says sometimes they don't even have to say anything (and you know all is well with them) and it's all good. He goes back in and gets Jessie, and she tells him Vienna is bad for him and crashes cars and her daddy pays for it. He appreciates hearing that. He takes Vienna outside and she doesn't want him to listen to all those other girls and wants to know what his friends and family will think about her. You can tell that he finally thinks she's batshit.

ROSE CEREMONY:

So, Tenley and Gia already have roses. Ali and Corrie get roses. Vienna, Ashleigh, and Jessie are left, and he makes them hang on. He goes to Chris Harrison and asks if he really HAS to give out two more roses or if he can send two more people home. DAMN, this dude is on a roll.

Who gets the final rose?

Who, you ask?

FREAKIN VIENNA.

Ashleigh would rather walk back to her home state than take the limo, from what I can tell.

They're going to San Francisco now. And he's falling for all of them. But the scenes from next week look GOOD.

The Bachelor Synopsis for Last Night


First of all, Vienna got to go on a one-on-one date with Jake, which was bungee-jumping. They're both terrified of heights. If only she was terrified of heights it would have been one thing, but he was so scared she really didn't have room to be scared at all, so she sucked it up and they jumped, and kissed upside down, and had a nice date and it went really well and she got a rose. Which pissed off EVERYONE ELSE because they all hate her.

Then there was a group date to Jon Lovitz's comedy club at Universal Studios, where the girls had to be the comedians and there was actually a real audience. Everyone was pretty unfunny, but CORY (I didn't know her until this episode) did her impression of everyone in the house. Everyone laughed gamely when she did her impression of them, but she spent most of her time mocking Vienna, which surprised Jake because he learned that everyone hates her (and of course Vienna wasn't there since it was the next night after her date). But when Michelle's turn came, she said this raunchy crap about how there are no coconuts on the prop trees on the stage because they're on her chest, and how she noticed that there's a little golf green on the stage but she's waiting for her one on one date so she can get a HOLE IN ONE. Nobody laughed at any of these jokes because everyone in the audience was completely horrified at how disgusting she was.



That night, at the "wrap" party, several people, including Ali from last week, who seems to be so confident in her own position that she will tell the crazies what she thinks of them (I kind of like this, and definitely like her with Jake, but fear she might need to shut it before Jake sees her mouthing off) told Jake of their severe disappointment in the fact that he a) TOOK Vienna on a date and b) KEPT her after the date. During this party, and the chats between the women while Jake was off on his private time with each lady, Michelle began to show signs of how unhinged she has really become. She began to cry when their "concerned citizen" approach broke her down, and stormed off to sit alone. Jake came to sit with her, but was up to his neck in his own bullshit, after hearing all the crap about Vienna.


Switch to present tense: So he sits down, hoping for a refuge from all that business, and tells her he's had a really hard night. She admits that she, too, has had a hard night, and begins to explain that it's really difficult "being here" and "doing this" - as if he hasn't been in her position before, and as if, frankly, a self-aware person wouldn't know herself well enough to be like, listen. Am I single and would I like to marry? Yes. Do I want to date someone while simultaneously living in the same house with a bunch of other women who are also dating him, and have it televised? NO! I don't. I just don't. And it's not because there's something wrong with me, it's because that's a lot of freaking pressure and it's actually MORE NORMAL to not do that than to do it. But I digress, because there obviously is something wrong with her. So anyway, she tells him that she doesn't think she can stay. But if he wants her to and asks her to, she will. And would it be really awkward if she asked if she can kiss him? Because she needs to know whether she feels something, anything. So at this point you can tell he's wanting to either drown her or himself. But he kisses her - gives her a long, but closed-mouth, kiss. And at the end of it, she's like, "That's all I get?" And he's like, "Look. You packed your bags LAST week because you didn't know if you could do this. I'm not going to give you a rose that someone else definitely knows they want. Let's get you outta here." Puts her in a cab and GUH - BYE."


The next date was a one-on-one, with Ella from LaFollette, TN. She's the one that has a son that wants to be a pilot. And her birthday was the previous episode and he had just found out about it like at the rose ceremony night. Well, totally ripped off from last season, he surprised her by flying her son out and taking them to Sea World. Blah, you're way Southern and a single mom and he rented an amusement park for you for your birthday. It would be more interesting if he could have thought of ANYTHING ELSE IN THE WORLD to do besides the exact same thing they did last year. And she got a rose. Shock and awe. Like you wouldn't get a rose after that.


There was also this "touching" scene where Vienna, who at this point has certainly deluded herself into thinking that she is Cinderella and everyone else is the ugly stepsisters, apologized to everyone in the house and claimed she would be nicer. This after everyone in the house has stabbed her in the back to Jake. Too little too late, my friend, as the stabbers admitted to what they'd done and said this apology rings a little hollow. Vienna collapsed into tears after declaring the apology very "hard for me".


This brings us to the Cocktail Party the night of the Rose Ceremony, which I will describe in the present tense, as that's just easier for me. First, Jake takes Elizabeth for some private time. She initiates the conversation by asking if he gives good back rubs. He says yes. She says she isn't dressed for it, but will remember that for a future one-on-one date. Jake, who is essentially losing his shit with the entire Bachelor process at this point, more or less accuses Elizabeth of being a tease. She's taken aback. He tells her that he has friends who have abstained from being physical for spiritual reasons, but that's obviously not the reason she asked him not to kiss her. And she said, correct. And he's just irritated. But before she can explain or they can reach any resolution, VIENNA comes up and interrupts them. Elizabeth says, "We're really right in the middle of something," but Vienna doesn't care. So Jake walks off. Elizabeth gets really upset and tells the other girls what happened. Ali is enraged and snaps at Vienna afterward - I mean, Vienna HAS A FREAKIN ROSE, let the other girls save themselves at this juncture, right??? But whatever. So, Elizabeth finds him again and tries to explain, but he is kind of over it. So that's the semi-shocker to me - at the ceremony, he didn't give her a rose.


And then the third one, dark hair, tan skin, has kids? I literally don't know her name and when they said goodbye I was like, I haven't even seen you before. So I guess I'm not going to miss her.


And so concludes my synopsis.

2007 Ski Trip: STOWE PART V

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A New Stowe

Sunday night, The Sleigh House hosted the residents of the satellite house for an evening of supper, song, and sport, Sleigh Style. The evening began with cocktails and fresh salad, and continued with yummy pizza from a local 'ria. Also on hand was a dessert bar, complete with sundae fixings that were a meal unto themselves.* Below, photographs from the evening...

*Can you tell that I'm actually writing this while listening to Red Carpet Oscar interviews? I'm really full of it.

Mette + MET

Here Mette and I flank Smitha, all bundled up, ready for some Beer Pong action.

White-eyed Missy takes a break from random urination to pose for a pic with friends Natty and Mia.

Weir and Nicole observe Beer Pong from the sidelines.

The members of the two houses came together for the love of the game, participating in an organized Beer Pong competition, complete with brackets and (most importantly) a follow-up Losers' Brigade competition. Here we see Team Camitha (pronounced "come hither") - Cammy and Smitha.



Amanda and Mette, not to be encumbered by unnecessary layers, immediately stripped down to the bare essentials - a move that served them very well, as they advanced impressively far in the tournament. Tourney, as I like to say. Here we see Amanda "bringing it," much to the delight of Joel. Or perhaps Joel is laughing at something else.

Cammy begins to realize that the tank tops are going to be serious competition, and steps up her game...

At this point, the tension began to rise between Alex and Greg, as both knew that only one man's girlfriend would advance to the next round - would their friendship survive?






Oblivious to the palpable tension between Alex and Greg, Amanda and Mette prepare to destroy the competition.




Smitha downs another Solo while Stacy clutches a Poland Spring midgee in terror of the knowledge that her own Beer Pong reputation would soon be on the block.


Regardless of Camitha's efforts, Mettanda emerged victorious.

Mette wants to dip her BALLS in it.

While Stacy prepares for a successful pairing with Evan, Jesse explains the effects of RNA structure on Beer Pong ability to Suhas (seen on the right, in this rare photographic evidence of Su with OPEN EYES!).

Bubbe and Golinko next took the stage, ready to demolish the competition.

2007 Ski Trip: STOWE PART V
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Stowe vs. Predator

This weekend, the Welo group (+ friends) went on our 5th Annual ski trip to Stowe, Vermont. Every year our friend Alex gets the same house, which technically sleeps 12, but every year, we push the envelope a little further - this year packing an impressive 23, plus the occasional overnight guest or four. This year there were so many people on the trip that our friend JC got a separate house entirely, and 12 people stayed there. The following series of pictures is from the trip...I have a million pictures, so I'll probably add a few every day...check back later for more!

Here's Golinko on Saturday night after we returned from visiting JC's house. They made us yummy dinner that was delicious, and once we stuffed our faces, we headed home to continue the craziness. Golinko stokes the fire while Mia plays with Weir's dog, Missy, in the background...

Here Joel rizocks the hizouse with his rendition of some Freedom Rock masterpiece...

While Pasky & Smitha get their Pong skills going with a little Ping (their appetizer for the real competition of the weekend: Beer Pong, or, to be more accurate, our version of Beirut).


While we waited for more friends to come back from the JC house, I convinced Joel to sing karaoke duets with me. Our rendition of Total Eclipse of the Heart is, shall we say, unique...


Once Pasky and Smitha finished their Ping Pong game, Natty and I subverted all tactics intended to continue the Ping Pong (or as Alex might say, Pink Ponk) tradition, by hijacking the table and throwing down the Beer Pong gauntlet. Here we see Natty declaring all resistance to be futile.


Then, Natty and I set up to face off with Joel and Pasky.


Somehow Alex and Suhas jumped us in line. Or else Natty and I lost. Either way.

Golinko exhibits the standard response to watching Pasky and Joel do pretty much anything...

Natalie attempts to burn a hole in the table with her eyeballs...

While Alex and Suhas exact their fierce Beer Pong vengeance...

Suhas sees the light at the end of the tunnel...

While Pasky and Joel see the beginning of the end...

Meanwhile, Bubbe busts out with karaoke moves...

I'm betting Cathy and Mia will make me delete this picture...but I think it's fun.

The warden's house at Alcatraz.

This is from my trip to Alcatraz this summer!

Suhas, Jason, MET, and Wes

Chilling with my friend Pam

With Ben and Pras at Korova

Me with Shannon and Ed on my 30th Birthday